In Short:
Insights with Priscilla
April 2026
What I learned when I turned off the shower…
The Romans had a god for doorways, the two-faced Janus, looking back at what was being left and forward at what was beginning. They invoked him at the start of every undertaking, no matter how small, because they understood something I am now realising. The hard part isn’t the next thing, it is choosing to leave the comfort of the current thing. That is the doorway.
In my morning shower I often stand under the warm water much longer than necessary. Not because I have nowhere to be. Quite the opposite. I usually have a full day ahead of things I genuinely want and need to do. And yet there I stand, unable or unwilling to press the off button on the shower.
And then, the other day, I noticed something revelatory. As soon as I had pressed the off button I was through the doorway….. there was no part of me that wanted to press it back on.
It takes just one second to transition through the doorway of discomfort.
Pressing the off button on the shower. Throwing back the duvet. Putting my phone down. Turning off the TV. Opening my laptop. Picking up my book.
I had always thought the obstacle was that I didn’t want to do what lay on the other side of the doorway. The insurance form. The phone call. The email. The book manuscript with a November deadline (yes, writing this newsletter is both an act of genuine connection and, I will admit, a slight postponement of chapter three).
But it is not that. As soon as I am through the doorway, I’m relieved. Once I am on the phone, I feel connected and grateful. Once I’m completing the form, the anxiety starts to lift. Once I’m writing I feel free. Once I am reading I am happy. Almost without exception, I am glad to be doing the next thing.
The shower, bed, reading, or whatever thing is giving us comfort can, at other times, be the thing we resist. So it’s rarely the ‘thing’ that should be our focus, because the same thing can sit on both sides of the doorway. The art is to be the master choosing the doorway.
Having realised this, I’m starting to really enjoy mastering the one-second doorways that keep my life moving in the direction of my choosing.
I would love to know if this resonates with you? What is your shower?
Some culture I’ve enjoyed this month
The Happiest Man on Earth is Eddie Jaku’s memoir of surviving the Holocaust. It is a chronicle of horror. Yet I felt nothing but awe; Eddie lost almost everything and yet discovered something most of us go our whole lives without finding: that mindless comfort teaches us very little nor provides the conditions for deep growth and transformation.
Eddie’s life became a slow, joyous and intentional act of gratitude, not in spite of what he had endured, but because of it. Reading this was like sitting with a wise elder and I learned so much. If he was still alive, I’d really want to meet him.
A friend recommended:
Margo’s Got Money Troubles by Rufi Thorpe and I really loved it. It’s a light read but contemporary and thought-provoking. Margo is a young woman navigating power dynamics, motherhood, money struggles, and life on her own terms. She turns to OnlyFans from a place of financial desperation and invites us to really understand her situation and choices rather than sitting in judgement. In fact it highlights the danger of judgment from well-meaning service providers who, by not asking the right questions, can do more harm than good. A great read.
Oh wow… this is the best “therapy” book I’ve read in a long time. You don’t need to be a therapist to enjoy it. A Brilliant Adaptation by Sally Maslansky is a powerful and deeply honest memoir, that explores one woman’s journey through dissociative identity disorder and the lasting impact of childhood trauma. As her seemingly perfect life starts to unravel, she is led into a challenging but ultimately healing process. She is lucky to be guided by the brilliant therapist, Dr. Dan Siegal, but it is also confronting as so few get access to the quality of care that she was afforded.
Frances Ha (Trailer/Film): I know this is an old film but what a joy to find it when it appeared on my Netflix recommendations. Frances (Greta Gerwig) lives in New York and it is a story about friendship and self-discovery. It is beautifully quirky… at times I cringed, at others I wanted to dance with joy and hug her. Do watch if you like something slightly out of the mainstream.
For therapists: If you work with clients living with OCD, I warmly recommend this on-demand 5-hour webinar by my dear friend and colleague Dr Joyce Blake, offering an evidence-based approach that integrates attachment-informed EMDR and CBT, grounded in her doctoral research. Shiraz Farrand of Trauma Aid UK calls it “a paradigm shift in how we approach supporting clients living with OCD.
Being held by the Blue Door Practice, this therapeutic group is for neurodivergent teenagers aged 13 to 17 who desire connection but find social situations confusing, stressful, or exhausting. It offers a welcoming environment where young people can freely be themselves whilst developing greater self-awareness and emotional resources. Being part of a group offers the opportunity to make meaningful connections and together the group will explore strengths, sensory needs, emotional experiences and ways of relating. This group is for those who identify as neurodivergent, with or without a diagnosis. It will run for 6 weeks.
Contact groups@thebluedoorpractice.com for more information.
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Thanks for reading
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May you find small moments to pause, reflect, and choose connection – even when it’s hard.
Warmly
Priscilla Short | Counselling Psychologist | EMDR Therapist | RLT-Certified Relationship Therapist | Creator of the TIMBBBBER Framework